billythekid

I subscribe to this channel, 2 million hits in 2 days this got!

Emm Jay

This weeks “jokes” have predictably been interspersed with those about Michael Jackson’s untimely death, be warned…

1. After the sad news of M Jackson’s death authorities have said they will melt down his body and make kids toys, so they can play with him for a change.
2. For sale: 1 white glove good condition apart from soiled middle finger.
3. Advice 4 all new immigrants in the UK….. If you are trapped in a burning house or have been seriously injured + you are bleeding 2 death…. the new emergency number is 0898454576875423(snip)…456!!!
4. After great sex my thai girlfriend lies stroking my penis, I ask ‘do you want more sex?’ no, she replies, i’m just admiring ur cock, i really miss mine.
5. Apparently Michael Jackson’s girlfriend is devastated! She told Sky news…”first my parents left me in Portugal, now this!”
6. I found out last night that my granny made a porno film back in the fifties. I don’t know what disgusted me more, the fact she done it, or the fact that i carried on wanking after i recognised her.
7. Women are like parking spaces… Normally all the good ones are taken… so occasionally when nobody is looking you have to stick it in a disabled one.
8. Lady walking past pet shop see’s big sign in window “clitoris licking frog Available now” Fuuuck ! She thinks to herself I’m going in! “Hi there” she says to shopkeeper “can I see the clitoris licking frog please?” “Bonjour madame”

Council Tax

Why the hell do we pay it? I wonder if there is a case for the withholding part of it should the services it funds fail to be delivered.

Yes more rant fodder in the form of Aberdeen City Council. I am amazed that one organisation can piss me off so much. Never in the history of my life have I been so disappointed by one organisation for the simple fact that were any other company to annoy me half as much they would be booted out in favour of one of their competitors.

There is no alternative for the council though!!! They are it. For better or, more commonly, worse. I’m skirting around the actual grievance here aren’t I? Sit down for this one.

In the entire time I’ve been living in Aberdeen City I’ve NEVER had my brown bin uplifted by the garden rubbish lorry. Not once! It’s been emptied by the regular bin people on a couple of occasions as they could see it sitting there week after week, grass spilling out of it, uncollected.

OK there’s never any grass spilling out of it as I usually empty my grass cuttings, one and a half brown bins full with each cut, into a pile in the trees by my driveway. The point remains though that this is supposed to be uplifted, I pay to have it uplifted by way of council tax and I never have it uplifted!

Well the dumping into the trees has come to an end because of Aberdeen City Council’s latest great idea. I really mean great idea here without the slightest hint of irony because I fully support it.

We now have food waste bags. This is to recycle our food waste into compost at some site in the shire to the good of the environment in more than one way!

Food bags filled after a freezer malfunction

Some unintended yet beneficial effects have been that almost all our household waste is recycled. Our kitchen bin no longer whiffs when you open the lid as there’s no rotting bacteria ridden food remnants in there(only some plastics and other waste the council doesn’t recycle for some reason, North Ayrshire Council does!) and it’s actually more convenient. Scraping food into the worktop caddy beside the sink is easier than hauling each plate to the bin and back. Yay!!?

..Nay!

The problem is, that when it’s time to replace your little caddy’s biodegradable liner(which are supplied by ACC) you place the old one full of food into, yes, your garden waste brown bin!

Well there is NO WAY I can empty my brown bin into the trees now as the waste food would attract vermin and other unwanted guests wouldn’t it? I’ve actually been in touch with ACC about this in the past, before we had the food bags. They have confirmed that I should be having my brown bin uplifted and the dates on which that should happen.

I actually pay two lots of council tax, one for Aberdeen City and one in another area where I have another (empty) house. That equates to 2 lots of council tax for the use of one lot of services, I’m not even getting that!

Now to add insult to injury my regular recycling collection failed to materialise today. They collected the rest of the scheme but left me! Fuckers!

Thankfully I did manage to get a second bin delivered the other week before these fortnightly collections start. Can we say rat-tastic much!

Were there some competition available I’d not use ACC that’s for damn sure!

Mobile Number Marketing Opt-Out →

Thanks to @misssym for this sweet tip!

Check out the old link! haha!: http://www.118800.co.uk/removeme/remove-me.html

Vodafone

As most people know I’m a Vodafone hater. I’ve been with the company since 1996 and it’s not getting any more likely that I’m going to rate them.

Anyhow, I’m within the last 30 days of my contract and have decided to shop around. When I phoned Vodacrud to make sure I knew how to leave them properly without incurring costs I got the mandatory sales pitch. I said I didn’t want Vodapoo as I fancied an iPhone. He gave me a blurb about another phone, the HTC Magic, being much better than an iPhone with faster processor and double the bandwidth capacity. All good then.

We eventually got to talking about pricing and the sums in my head weren’t adding up. So here they are now I’ve had a chance to research them.

I don’t use my phone for calls/texts it’s almost entirely for internet use(data).

So the guy offers me a 24 month contract(which I said no way to. I’m not being tied to them for 24 months!) at ~£35 for unlimited data and other perks I didn’t pay attention to around calls/texts. 600minutes free or something. This package features the iPhone killer, the HTC Magic.

So I nip on to the O2 website to check out their PAYT iPhone packages.

When you buy a new iPhone from O2 you get a 12 month unlimited data & wi-fi pack free, which you can continue afterwards for £10 per month.

So here are the sums…

Vodafone Phone - HTC Magic £35 x24months =£840

O2 PAYT Phone - Apple iPhone 3G S 16GB £440.40 +(12months @£10 for the data = £120) =£660.40

That’s £179.60 of a saving if you go with a pay as you talk package for 24 months without being tied in to a contract with Vodasuck AND a genuine iPhone. (Even at 18 months which you’d get the guy down to with no effort it’s £129.60 cheaper to go with O2)

I use Linux so this is probably all moot anyhow, I’d take the HTC for compatibility, also it seems to be a better phone AND it runs the awesome Google Android OS. Also I generally hate all things Apple for the “trendy” factor but it still goes to show how it’s not always cheaper to go for the contract. Especially with the dire and barely literate VodaIndia customer ‘care’.

Kids Parties

Essential kit for all kids parties from now on is spotify. Thanks spotify I now don’t need to actually know any of the “music” the kids like, keeping my mp3 collection un-soiled! w00t!

REAL Aberdeen →

I don’t know why this hasn’t been done before.

DVLA

I got a road tax reminder through this week from the DVLA. They’re so stupid.

I got a new number plate the other week but of course they sent me the reminder for my old one! Anyone wanna take a bet on whether I can renew online now?

rolls eyes

My favourite video for a while now. The dance is a modern west coast swing for those interested. Music is “How to Save A Life by The Fray.

Just checking out the tumblr options really (yeah I know I’ve had one before but it’s still “new” in as far as the old tumblelog was exclusively for Blogshares and as such was pretty much a links-list!

Enjoy the vid (especially the combinations at 1:47-1:54 and 2:07-2:17)

My Tech(-ish) blog. →